Brother
by Victoria Alatamir Wan
Summary: "For Merry, losing Pippin is like losing his other half." -Dominic Monaghan. For Pippin, it's like that too. Eowyn and Gandalf comfort them on the eve of battle- one in Rohan, the other in Minas Tirith. Slash ONLY if you want it to be. Rated for angst.


**Brother**

A/N: Okay, so I just had this idea...If I got anything wrong, I apologize deeply. It's been a while since I watched ROTK and I never really got past page, like, 63 of the book because I had to return it to the library.

So basically, I was thinking that the Rohirrim rested for at least one night on their way to Gondor...correct me if I'm wrong!

* * *

"The stars are bright tonight, are they not, Merry?"

Merry, sitting on the ground with his legs crossed, looked up from contemplating the fire. Éowyn strode silently out of the shadows of the trees to join the halfling by the fire. The night sky looked as if it had been sprinkled with sparkling diamonds, Merry noted. Then he sighed, thinking of how Pippin's eyes shone with laughter and life even in the darkest of times.

"Something rests heavy on your heart tonight, little one." Éowyn frowned, concern in her expression. Her hair, bound into a bun at the nape of her neck, shimmered in the firelight. Merry sighed, resting his head in his hands as he watched the crackling fire. He remembered a different fire, in a wide hall, burning brightly as he, Pippin, Frodo, and Sam laughed and talked late into the night. "I miss him. So much."

"Pippin?" A nod from Merry. "Is he your brother?" A long silence followed this question. Éowyn had just opened her mouth to apologize for asking, when Merry murmured, "No...He is my cousin. But we are...closer than some true brothers I know." A sigh, then, "I don't remember a time when we were ever separated like this. It feels like...a piece of my heart is missing...like I should be bleeding to death right now, but I'm not."

Éowyn nodded. "You two are very close. I know I would feel that way if anything happened to Éomer. If he ever had to ride to battle without my being able to help him." Merry stretched out on his back, looking up wistfully at the sky. "My lady...forgive me for asking, but...has Éomer ever left you...like Pippin left me?"

"Yes...a very short time ago, Gríma Wormtongue exiled him from Edoras and claimed that it was under orders from Théoden King. I did not know if I would see my brother again, dangerous as the wilds of Rohan are. 'Twas fortunate that Gandalf healed my uncle when he did, and more fortunate still that he brought my brother back safe." Éowyn smiled a little as she looked over at Merry. "Do not fear for Pippin. He will be safe."

Merry smiled back. "Thank you, my lady...your comforting words are a boon in this troubled time. But..." He hesitated. "There is more that troubles me," he finally whispered. "Do tell," said Éowyn, frowning. Merry drew a shaky breath.

"Just before Pippin left, I spoke to him harshly. More harshly than he deserved. And now he is in Gondor...the most dangerous place he could be right now. I'm just...so afraid that he will...die..." Merry swallowed, turning fearful eyes on Éowyn as tears trickled down his cheeks. "And die thinking I hate him. Would that I could have seen fit to tell him I loved him when it might have been the last time I ever saw him alive."

Éowyn reached out and gently brushed the halfling's tears away. "Nothing could shake Pippin's belief in your love for him," she said, confidently. "You may be angry with him, and speak harsh words, but he knows that underneath it all, you still love him. Not even if you hurt him—which I know you would not for all the gold in Middle-earth," she added hastily, seeing how Merry cringed at the thought, "Not even if you hurt him would he believe you did not love him." She held Merry close, comforting him until his sobs quieted.

He yawned then, his sapphire eyes blinking sleepily, and curled up more comfortably on his side. "Thank you, Éowyn. I think I knew that...all along...but it helps to hear it from another's lips."

The White Lady of Rohan felt an affectionate smile begin to steal across her face. "It was nothing. Sleep well, Merry."

* * *

Pippin stared up at the canopy over his bed. It was as blue as his cousin's eyes. Sighing at the thought of Merry, whom he might never see again, he turned over and closed his eyes, willing himself to sink into sleep.

No use.

The hobbit sat up, slipping out of his bed silently. Gandalf was asleep—at least, Pippin assumed so—in the other bed, and would most likely not appreciate being woken. Emerald eyes regarded the large room before Pippin turned to the balcony. With silent steps, he leapt onto the small stone bench, resting his arms on the railing of the balcony. He tipped his head back, relishing the feel of the cool night air on his face.

Again, his thoughts strayed to Merry, safe—hopefully—in Rohan. An uncomfortable pressure rose in his throat at the thought of how they had parted. Merry had spoken bitterly to him, with anger in his face. Then Gandalf had hurried Pippin away—to Gondor.

"_Why did you look? Why do you always have to look?" Merry cried, frustrated. _

"_I don't know. I can't help it." _

_"You never can." Merry's voice was bitter now._

_"I'm sorry, all right? I won't do it again." Pippin hurried to catch up with his cousin._

_Merry turned to face him suddenly, a strange emotion in his face. "Don't you understand? The enemy thinks you have the Ring. He's going to be looking for you, Pip. They have to get you out of here." _

_"And you...you're coming with me?" Merry turned away angrily and walked faster._

_"Merry?" _

_"Come on," he said brusquely._

_The two hobbits arrived at the stables, and Gandalf picked Pippin up and set him on Shadowfax. Merry stood by the horse's head, watching their every move. _

_"We'll see each other soon. Won't we?" Pippin was still young, after all._

_"I don't know. I don't know what is going to happen." _

_"Merry..."_

To his horror, Pippin suddenly realized that his cheeks were wet with tears. Angrily, he swiped at his eyes, determined not to show weakness now.

He was startled out of his thoughts by a strong hand on his shoulder. He nearly shrieked, but then realized it was only Gandalf. "Gandalf...did I wake you? I'm sorry," he said quickly, hoping Gandalf wouldn't be angry with him again. But the wizard shook his head. "No. In all honesty, I couldn't sleep either." He looked at Pippin carefully, noting his tear-streaked face. "What troubles you?"

As much as Pippin did not want to answer, somehow Gandalf always managed to get an answer out of him. "It's...Merry." Gandalf raised one bushy eyebrow. "I...I miss him a lot," murmured Pippin, looking down at his feet. "My chest aches...like my heart's been torn in half. Like a piece of my heart still lies in the plains of the Ridder-Mark." There was that uncomfortable pressure in his throat again.

Gently, Gandalf reached out and lifted Pippin's head with a hand under his chin. "There is more that troubles you, _perian_," he said, bushy eyebrows furrowing.

Pippin fidgeted uncomfortably. "Well...I mean, I know it was really my own fault and all...with the palantír..." He cringed. "But...well, Merry and I parted on bad terms...and I'm afraid I won't ever see him again...that he'll ride to battle with the Rohirrim and go to his death not knowing I love him...I am such a fool." This last part was spoken very softly as Pippin brushed away tears again.

Gandalf spoke then, quietly. "He knows, Peregrin Took." Pippin looked up, surprised. "How...how can you be sure?" A small smile crept over Gandalf's face then. "Did you not see his face when Shadowfax galloped away with you on his back? Valar, it was heartbreaking...I swear there were tears in his eyes as he watched you disappear from his sight. I regretted my decision to bring you here, simply because of the look on his face. But of course, what is best is not always easiest," he finished with a sigh, the smile gone now.

Pippin listened, in shock. Then, as he pondered over the wizard's words again, he broke down weeping. "Oh, Gandalf," he cried, and flung himself into his arms, sobbing into his shoulder. Gandalf was taken by surprise for a moment, but quickly recovered and comforted Pippin as best he could.

Slowly, Pippin's sobs quieted, and Gandalf set him gently on his feet again, smiling warmly. "Thank you," whispered Pippin, looking up at him. "I feel much better." This last was punctuated with a small grin that lit up the hobbit's emerald eyes.

"Good," said Gandalf simply, and a twinkle came into his eye as he added, "Now...regarding sleep...It would not be such a bad idea at the present..."

* * *

With a flash of terror that pierced his heart, Pippin recognized the still form lying underneath the body of an orc. Rushing forward, he dragged his cousin out. "Merry..." he whispered, cradling the still body in his arms. Sapphire eyes slowly flickered open, and hope rose in Pippin's heart again.

"Merry...it's me...It's Pippin." His voice broke in the middle of his words, but he couldn't care less at the moment. Merry's eyes focused on his cousin, and his lips parted. "Pippin...I knew...you'd find me..." he whispered, his eyes never leaving Pippin's. Pippin felt tears rise in his eyes again, and he bowed his head.

"Pippin...are you going to leave me?" Pippin raised his head again to meet Merry's eyes. "No, Merry," he said firmly. "I'm going to take care of you."

* * *

A/N: Like it? Hate it? Please review and let me know! As always, constructive criticism welcome...I'd like to know how I could do better!


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